80 Years Young

Today is my Grandmother's 80th Birthday...80 how crazy is that. That's over 3 times my age. I just talked to her on the phone and we were joking that it was like her 69th birthday or something, but then I remember a little mnemonic device from 3rd grade when I was learning times tables. I will forever remember my Grandmother was 63 when I was in 3rd grade because 9 times 7 is 63 and that was how old she was.

It's crazy how many changes she's seen in her 80 years...I'd be willing to bet it's been the 80 most evolutionary years to date. The technology, medical advances, the tragedies, the war, the peace.

I don't know if I'd want to live to be 80 or not. Part of me would rather not to live long enough to watch everyone around me die. Sorry for being morbid, but it's true. At the same time I wouldn't want to die prematurely like my dad did at 58. So where does that leave me...I guess with a 22 year window, but then again I truly believe everything happens for a reason and you go when your supposed to go. I think that everyone has a fated day they die, but what you ultimately die from more circumstantial.

Ok I'll stop being depressing, but it's not my fault I've been reading a book my secretary gave me about a school shooting - Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult - that is told from like 6 different perspectives. It's healthy to talk and think about death because it is the only certain in life. I remember in college some of my friends were taking a Death and Dying class, I think it was a Sociology class. My friends always interviewed me for class assignments, I was fascinated. I was actually looking up Spring Courses in the online course catalog for a Death and Dying and/or Bereavement class, but I couldn't find any. I think it would not only but interesting, but also helpful. Again sorry for being Debbie Downer, but I just can't get past how close November is. It doesn't feel real that only last September my dad was alive. Everyone says the first year is the hardest...we'll see.

I'll try and have a more positive post next time, but I did warn you that this blog would be full of ups AND downs. Such is life.