THE List
-Dirty republicans
-I’m married but I took my wedding ring off in the weight room
-How about you take my buddies back to our hotel room and we’ll give you some redbull vodka
-HELLO...Hello
-100% alcohol cosmos
-I’m not some perv I have references
-Do you have your resume now or do you need to print it
-Are you from Minnesota x 2
-Are you wiccan x 2
-You sound like Sarah Palin
-I’m a nice guy...
-Blonde headed slut...there may or may not be jaeger in here
-Brain hangover
-We took pictures driving the shot bus...that sounded bad
-I have to change my underwear x5
-Dangerzone
-Hot pockets
-25 birthday licks
-No balls Freddie
-I have cotton mouth
-Sara you were really hungry
-Loafers...bangs...crokeys
-Falling up the stairs
-Shaker whistling
-Aisle roamers
-Super Mario Brothers - correction hot Super Mario Brothers
-Toit pants, tiot shots
-Fashion police
-Taking obvious pictures of people and things
-...all for you
-Thai lezbos
-Sushi feeding
-Hand measuring
-Stale fortune cookies
-Crazy change crack whore
-Spiffy lip balm holder
-I’m gonna drop my keys and see of he picks them up
-Wing woman
-Arm wrestling
-Dane-ish not Danish
-Polygamy
-Pinkies up
-We’re married in my mind
-Dave your crotch smelled so bad you almost made a dog puke
-Shit eater
-Wheezing
-Making out in the parking lot
-Jenn should we not go to bed
-Freddie’s afraid of you he doesn’t want you to in here
-No I didn’t open the door
-Making out on the oven
-Prop cigarette
-Thumbs up thumbs down
-Investigating his wallet
-Showing up at supper club...OMFG
-Stalking us
-Towed car...expletives
-I already know the answer to this but, can me and 5 friends can crash at your place
-I’m sleeping on a dog pillow
-Coffee and ice cream sandwiches
-Smiley face mug
-Skim milk...half and half...did you say you wanted skim milk
-Your dog is queer
-Sara she locked the door
-Can you drop me off first at the Best Western???
-You dance like a stripper
-SNAPS
-Girlie man beer
-Wal-mart the one stop shop
-Where are you guys??
-Creepy candid camera
-Mouthwash.
-Furry teeth
-He couldn’t come upstairs I had to take my eyelashes off
-Were u sitting on the floor making out with him????????
-There were too many hot men here...all the electronics went on the fritz
-I’d rather take a drug dealer over someone who lives at home
-Babygirl
-Do not go in there
-It doesn’t sound as good when we say it out loud
-I didn’t touch his junk...hand raise...I did
-As pushy as he was he was respectful
-This is a courtesy message from...
-Bad accents
-Ignorance is bliss...in the south
-Message on Colleen’s voicemail
-Channing Tatum and Adam Pascal
-I forgot to close my tab x2
-I can't get over how those really look like daisies
-Dave is it ok if I look at her trampstamp
-Ink on my body has nothing to do with how sexually active I am...look at all that shit on your arms
-Adam sit down..sit..where are you going to go
-Snoring x2
-Unconscious in the kitchen/living room
-Adam wake up!
-We’re on the couch 96ing
-No Jenn a 69 would look like this...no don't show me
-2 hours of sleep total between us
-Talking about armpit hair x2
-butt crack
-I know everything about you except you blood type, your shoe size,and your name
-He looks like a cat...who Freddie or Adam
-I don’t want to wake him up because he’ll relize his car is towed
-It’s quiet hours guys
-Did you know your car was towed x2 or 3
-Take one last minute to let it all out
-Freddie photoshoot
-Shuttlecock - literally shuttling cock
-Can you send a picture of that Tator guy?
-OMG my blog from Thursday like came true!
And finally...
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